Dismantling the Boys’ Club: Say She She talks Friendship, Feminism and Disco
Pleaser is where it is today because of the hard work of women. Women from every corner of the world put their soul into their work and bring beauty to the music industry because of their passion. Say She She is no different. With their Disco beats and close friendship, their feminine power gives them the unique ability to create and do something wonderful.
Their music was rather new to me, but I was drawn to their blast-from-the-past style and their electric personalities. When we saw they were going to perform at Richmond’s Iron Blossom festival, we felt it was the perfect time to have a conversation with a band that holds the same values we do!
PHOTO BY LINDSEY DADOURIAN
Pleaser: Hello! Wow, this was the first time I've ever seen you perform. It was incredible! I loved the synchronized dances, but also your voices meld so perfectly together. I'm curious how you figured out how you all work so well together.
Sabrina Mileo Cunningham: I think we're just fans of each other’s voices, really. I mean, we were friends first, so that's where it all stemmed from. You know when you enjoy your friends' company even better when they can sing really well? It's an amazing thing to be able to sing together and just love what each other comes up with. It's just lovely.
Piya Malik: I always laugh because we were doing this well before we had a band. We were just annoying people at restaurants when we got drunk—singing from the table and harmonizing—and now people pay to see a show, which is crazy. It’s lovely to be in the writing room with each other and encourage each other.
We've all been in different projects with other people where we felt kind of unfulfilled, you know, and maybe shut down by some people. I love the fact that we never do that to each other. We never say something isn’t good. We might just suggest something else if we don’t like it; we could do something better. It’s really nurturing. It's supportive like you expect your friends to be, and you don't always have that in your workplace.
There are a lot of bands that have [little support], you know. I hear these terrible and toxic stories. I'm like, why are you guys even doing it then? We just wouldn't do it. I wouldn't do it. It’s not worth it. It has to be with people that feel like there's a true ability to work together and not shut each other down.
Nya Gazelle Brown: I think we also have similar tastes and aesthetics in how we like things to sound. For me, when we’re harmonizing together, it really brings calmness and joy, both physically and emotionally. It just feels really nice. I think that’s really how we can blend together; we’re kind of vibrating on a similar frequency. Yeah, I would describe it like that.
PM: I’ve also been in other projects where people will say, “Oh no, sing it this style. Sing it like this.” I’m always like, “Eh.” Because we’ve never done that, we always just sing like ourselves. If we want to use different voices to make each other laugh, maybe we will make everyone out there laugh.
When it comes to your sound, I feel like you do a lot of genre-blending, but it's settled on this disco-funk kind of vibe. How did you come across that sound and who inspired you?
PM: That's such an amazing question because, of course, there are all these musicians that we've been listening to for years that have inspired us. Some are super well-known household names and some are more underground. Some are DJs we listen to, and some people we know in New York, and then there's each other and the band that we work with. It’s a way that we write; it’s a groove and kind of right in the room together, so [we’re] feeding off each other’s energy.
How different is it playing a hometown show in New York versus coming to a festival like this?
NGB: I think a lot of our community that we respect comes out along with us, but New York definitely has a special place in our hearts because that's where we formed the band. Today, it’s always a wonderful day. We come to places like this especially to see new faces and make new connections. This [was] such a great crowd today—having a really, really great audience. So responsive and so receptive, and ready to have a good time. So it'll always go down in the books for us. We definitely want to come back here because of the love we felt on stage today.
SMC: Festivals are always fun! We had a good time. We get to see all these incredible bands, and there's just so much talent in one place.
Today, you played your song "Norma," and it has that lyric "We will not go back," which has kind of become the tagline for the political scope today. How do you feel it's important to use your voice in this way?
PM: It's who we are. People have asked us, "Oh, are you sure you want to be political?" and we're like, "What? We're being ourselves!" We’re friends who came together in New York in a very natural, organic way. We weren’t put together to form a band or something, or answering an ad on Craigslist. It was something so natural. All our friendships are based on an exchange of ideas. That's what our music then became, but first, the friendship and the ideas flow and values. Our whole life is political. Who we are is political. All of us have different backgrounds and histories but [we] also share values. That’s a no-brainer for us to write about what is happening in this world.
We are women being attacked, and we thought we got rid of him [Trump], and now he's trying to come back. So we’re not going back.
We actually wrote it [“Norma”] the day that we heard Roe v. Wade would potentially be overturned. We were worried, and that’s what the lyric "Write a letter to the state" was about—getting people to get engaged. People always say they aren’t political, but you may think you aren't, but it affects you like it affects all of us.
We’re lucky we have a stage to talk about it, and we’re lucky that our fans are receptive. We’ve had places where we stood up, and it was kind of bracketed…People walked out. That's the reality.
SMC: I would also say, generally, people do agree with us, which feels really good. To see that in the crowd, too, I feel supported, and feel like we get each other. It’s just amazing to use our voices through music.
PM: It’s cool when you see young women, too. Some of the all-ages shows you see five-year-olds doing the moves, and it’s really special. But especially teenagers. To me, that’s really important. That was a time in my life where I’m so grateful that we had the kind of support we had in our lives. We took it for granted, and we never thought we would have [those] kind of rights taken away from us. That level of comfort is now being threatened, and human rights are being taken away from us. It’s important for the younger people to know that they have the ability to stop it.
It must be super scary for them to see this sort of dystopian vision of the future and the way the media portrays right-wing politics. There’s so much polarization, and for them to feel like it’s actually tangible in their lives—that their rights are getting taken away—is probably really scary. I feel like having music as a sort of element or a place to have messages of support and security is super important.
I think feeling attacked as a woman is common now. Even in the industry, it’s very much a boys' club, and I’m curious how you all go about navigating such a male-dominated space while being true to yourselves and your art.
SMC: I would say the power of partnership. We just support each other and stand behind each other. When we feel strongly about something, I would personally feel very intimidated to do something alone, but because there are three of us, it makes it easier to navigate. We’ve had to grow a thick skin. We’ve had our fair share of situations that have been challenging.
PM: Luckily, not from our boys on stage. Having them makes me feel like I have a sense of superpower because they’re all feminists—all of them. The way they respect us as the leaders and the visionaries—seeing what we want when we're in sessions, they aren’t trying to take over and belittle us, saying we’re just a bunch of singers and girls like we’ve dealt with in the past.
Even though [Nya] went to music school, even though all these powerful jobs [Sabrina] had, it doesn’t matter; they will still treat you like that. But not them [the band]. They’re so encouraging and exciting, and they have such incredible musicianship. Their willingness to let us dictate our projects, our music and our business that all of us have invested in is very reassuring. People on the outside of the band, they don’t get it, but that's fine because we know how to handle those guys.
Your track "C'est Si Bon" is about living life to the fullest, throwing your worries to the side and encouraging others to do the same. What moment in your career made you say "C'est Si Bon" and inspired this track?
NGB: We wrote that song, along with many of the other songs on Silver in the pandemic towards the end. We wanted to celebrate life after all the trauma that the world had just been through. It was a moment to bring joy back into the world. All the loss, all the heartbreak, all the fear—everything that was happening around the world—it was time to celebrate that we made it. And here we are now; we’re living, let’s make the most of it, let’s celebrate each other.
SMC: We were missing playing live, too. We were really just wanting to get the party started, you know?
PM: It was the first time we were allowed on the bloody dance floor together, so it was like, “We gotta write something!” Also, it was meant to make people laugh and ourselves laugh. When we were in the studio, we were being so silly, and we thought, if we find it funny, maybe the people out there will. But people don’t necessarily laugh when we play it.
NGB: They need to watch the video. The video is very funny; it’s so silly. It’s just poking fun at ourselves, and it’s just so fun—we’re driving around in this car that is covered in aluminum foil.
PM: The disco mobile!
All: The disco mobile!
PM: It was so fun! It was so fun making it as well.
